What Kind of "Control" Do People With Diabetes Have?
I want to lose “control”
I imagine the difference it might make if everyone, from the medical community to well-meaning friends and family, were to stop using the phrase "in control" or "well/poorly controlled" in reference to perceived success or failure as a person who lives with diabetes.
There is already a notion around diabetes that people with the disease lack control; that the reason those individuals have diabetes (type 1 or 2) is because they don't have the self-control to stay away from "bad" foods. We know this is not the case, yet we encounter people (even medical professionals) who still believe it to be true.
And it isn't just in the case of diabetes where the word "control" causes strife.
How does that word make you feel when you read it or speak it or imagine it scrawling itself out against the page? To me, it feels a bit cold and calculating. It has power in it, but the words or thoughts surrounding it determine to whom it belongs.
The thing about control is that, generally, we like when we have it and fear when we do not. Learning to relinquish control of the things we never truly had control over is a great source of freedom and empowerment. Perhaps there are more productive, healthier ways of envisioning the ebb and flow of diabetes-related challenges than that of a power struggle between us and disease of daily unknowns.
So what kind of things do we not have control over? So many things, like other people's thoughts, ideas, actions, words, feelings, or mistakes (including and especially their use of stigma-causing words in reference to our chronic illness).
What things do we have control over? Our own thoughts, ideas, actions, words, feelings, and mistakes (and how we let other people’s perceptions or language make us feel.)
Diabetes is just one area where we may lack the ability to control all circumstances, but in a general sense: you are the captain of your own ship.
Your actions steer it. Your thoughts, ideas, and feelings determine your perceived success of the voyage—the only perception that truly matters.
Your mistakes can either bring down the ship, or allow it to become storm-weathered and proven for the next passage. If the ship goes down, you are responsible...but when it succeeds? That is on you, too.
Feeling ready to reclaim the power around your health? Let’s talk about how to make that happen so you can live your healthiest, happiest, most confident life with diabetes.